My son is so incredibly beautiful and bright and loud and opiniated and empathic and vulnerable. Chicory was also very beautiful and incredibly large-hearted and generous and unbelievably brave and vulnerable and so warm. I am grateful for these two souls choosing me. 

I need to be writing my CV and my statement of claims for job applications, and I am sitting here, my heart breaking over the people and souls who chose me and those who didn't. Those who I chose and those that I wasn't able to. 

Half my life is over and there are things that I might never be able to do again or do at all..

• Rock-climbing*
• .. in the himalayas*
• falling in love, gently**
• growing old together**
• pottery and making art*
• having a beautiful garden*..   

So many things I cannot thank the Universe enough for:

• all those years where it was just Chicory and me, and Heather and Kavi and Canberra - how can i ever thank the Universe enough for those years? 
• and Ingrid and Tanu
• my baby and my mum together
• my parents and me
• my house not so far from the beach
• my brother who i get along with in a good comfortable way
• 
  

*still possible, right?

** maybe?