Even closer to the end of 2018!

This year is not looking like it is going to ease up easy! By which what I really mean is that while it is not going all 'effing shit' on me, it seems to be asking for more than I want to give.


or to put it other words, while its not like I have been woken up in a burning building, after only an hour of sleep after a 48 hour shift, in a month of 48 hour shifts, and realised that there is a cat that needs rescuing with me. But it does feel like I have 12 miles to run when I thought I only had 2 miles to go... and I AM OUTTA STEAM!!!


Being who I am, I have 3 ways of dealing with this:
1.  Complain about it
2.  Think about it while
3.  Reading about it, and
4.  Writing about it.


Complaining about it was easy and easily done. Actually, all of it was easy, and maybe I need to pay attention to this detail and use it in my life somewhere.


Costly half wins
is to give it your best shot
and for that to not be enough
not enough to land the job
or complete the project
or get the pat on the back


and then to not lose hope
and try again and again


because the story we tell ourselves
is the only story we let ourselves see
is the story make sure comes true


and you can't keep a good person down
for long.


So when you can't see the
end flag
or more likely,
can't remember what race you signed for
and wonder if you could possibly care less
about it anyway


But no feeling is final
and lets not pretend this apathy will last for too long
if we don't hold on to it either!!

Signing off on such ambiguous motivations...